A negotiation.Studio? SINGING!!

I feel like I've been challenged! *_* hahaha

My mom told me about two nights ago "if you write lyrics for a song, I'll pay for you to go to a studio" because her and my sister are tried of hearing me sing around the house hahaha

But I wonder if she'll remember.

I find that song writing is the same as speaking. The lyrics should at least be different or unique (or the music) because it's the expression of a person's point of view. I've tried writing lyrics before, but I realized I was thinking way to hard. It's all about speaking what you feel. Not speaking what someone else wants to hear you speak. Kind of like with my blog. I'm not wondering how to blog. To be honest, I don't even know what I'm suppose to blog about. So I just write what I feel regardless of how sad it seems, or how strange it seems. I guess emotions are that way.

So I guess I've come to some idea why blogging helps me. When I push it out of my mind that someone else may read this some time in the future, it's easier. It's mainly like I know there is a possibility but I'm speaking to myself.

On the other hand, with lyrics it does consist of being vulnerable because others will hear your true feelings. To me, that's difficult. I don't completely speak my mind with %100 conviction. I would softly try to get my point across, whereas in the inside I'm shouting it loudly.

When I tried to write lyrics I was worrying to much. But I feel if I blog first then write it would be easier. For instance, if I'm trying to write something neat, like some kind of metaphor, I would be thinking to hard about what would rhyme would the first part lol I don't think that's what it's about.

Since writing is a form of art (or should I say self-expression) if you think to much about it, you stifle your creative flow. It brings back a time in high school where it was my first time painting and I was scared to make mistakes. It took me many days to finally just let go. And I could see the results.

It's the same with singing, or I think with a lot of things in life. For example, even though my sister and mom get tried of hearing me sing, to me it's more like trying to speak in my voice. Finding my own voice among the many. So when I feel I'm forcing it or it's weak (my voice) I become more determined. There are certain days where certain sounds come out and I would stop and say "That sounded so free! How did I do that?" and when I would try to go back and do it again, I wouldn't be able to because I'm thinking about it.

Hm....we don't think about what we will feel, we just feel it. It's the same thing with expressing ourselves I guess. It's like that instance "AH!" kind of feeling. A sudden urge.

Like now I just thought "I will try to write lyrics", which already started off on the wrong foot because I'm thinking of writing "lyrics" rather than just writing what I think or feel. Anyways, the first line I got was "You take it away..." I thought it sounded it neat, but I had no idea what "it" was or rather who this "you" is. So I just thought "Hm....well, what rhymes with away?"

Nope nope, that doesn't work for me. Mines usually come freely. Such as if I'm thinking about something. Like earlier today when I was walking to the library I was in awe, the leaves were coming down into the streets like they were dancing. Like snow flakes! And I started to feel a little sad because it felt like I was saying good-bye to something. Maybe I wouldn't be able to see that same leaf again or something. But I seriously felt sad.

Anyways, something like that could become a song. But I think, for the most part, even if I wanted to I could write some kind of story-form lyrics. Maybe I should say "lyrics" because I already have a notion of what I think "lyrics" should be like.

Hm...I think it's just difficult for me to find the words I need. I read that building my vocabulary would help. I agree. I mean I seriously listen to Eminem and wonder how he does it!! He's a genius at writing.

But I think it really helps me if I listen to some kind of music without singing. Images come to my mind. I even use music when I draw.

Mon