Watching T.V again

My mom and sister are about to watch t.v. again.

I don't know why it annoys me that they do this every week, and almost everyday, but it really does.

It's like the t.v. is there life. We just don't do much together anymore.

To me, I wonder if this is normal for some families to do. Just sit in front of the t.v.

*sighs* It just make me very sad and annoyed. And I'm sure they know this because whenever they get together in front of the t.v. I come in my room. Just like now.

And neither of them exercise anymore.My sister keeps saying how she wants to. My mom keeps saying how she wants to. But they don't. That frustrates me. I don't know why, but it does.

What gets me is that the shows they watch come on every week and they feel the need to tune in every week. I stopped watching programs like this. I slowly started to turn myself away from watching t.v. One day I just stopped and looked at myself and I realized that what I'm doing was a waste. Yeah, it was fun seeing the actors and actresses act, it's a talent. But while they're living their lives, what was I doing? Watching them live their? What point does that serve? Ratings I guess.

But I understand that some things in life aren't gonna go the way I want it. And the only thing I can truly change is myself. I guess I continue to keep going by pursuing my interest and goals. Just thinking of that makes me happy. But I look at my family and it makes me sad that we are not close to each other. It's very distant. That makes me annoyed. Maybe that's why the t.v. thing annoys me the most.

It just feels very empty. Whenever I do try to talk to my mom or sister about something, they'll interrupt me and talk about something else. Then I'd just sit quietly. I would just give up. What's the point in speaking to someone who won't listen?

So now I just quit. *sighs* Honestly, when I take a deep breath, I'm not sad. I get sad thinking about it, but when I breath deeply I don't feel that way. It's like, just accept what they do, once I move on, I'll be able to live my life happily.

All I know is that I don't want to look back when I move on.Looking back won't solve anything.It's not that I don't have people I can talk to, I do. It's just the people I call "family" I wish I could talk them. But I don't think they completely understand this at the moment.

Maybe I should stop pursuing this because it will only make me sad.

Hm....I just thought, maybe deep down I'm trying to work something out with them, but they aren't letting me.

Well, I feel better now. I'm not annoyed anymore. I feel better. Now I'm a bit more happier lol

So I shouldn't worry about what they are doing. And when they're ready I'll be waiting. I also realize that a "family" can come not just from blood relations, but also from the outside world as well.

Mon

Oh! My birth chart says I should work on getting over my sensitivity. Any suggestions? I don't like being sensitive to stuff. But I know it's who I am. I read that it's best to see that not everything should be taken personally. And to have some humor. I think I take things seriously when it's directed my way. It will take some time for me to see myself from a higher place. But I really hate when people direct negativity my way. It makes me so irritated. And then I end up walking away or getting silent so I can calm down and not direct it back at them. It only takes a few minutes for me to cool down and I can approach the situation again with peace.

So, any suggestions?