09.28.12

Good afternoon~~

I often type here even though I have a Japanese blog.

I can't express myself so much in Japanese so I type here. Actually I do enjoy my Japanese blog because there are a lot of Japanese people who help me when I make a mistake. I should get more serious with my Japanese studies!

So, today I'm feeling "meh"

I feel a bit better now. I would actually start to feel a little discouraged if I think about my future.

"I have all of these things I want to do, and yet I'm sitting" is what I think when I look at myself in the present.

But I once read somewhere, or I think I heard (I believe Simon Cowell said this) that people should enjoy the time getting to that place you would like to get there. Yes, yes it was Simon Cowell. I really like him! He's very handsome to me lol I think I will always have a thing for older men. It's true. I like Hugh Jackman, Robert Downey Jr. etc lol even my favorite Japanese male singers are older than me.

So at the moment let's see, I just had breakfast. I woke up a little disappointed. I don't like routine so much. So I knew today would probably be like yesterday.

So I got up and made breakfast. Oh! Before I continue, I stayed up really late to read Kago Ai's blogs! Now she's 24. I'm so surprised! She grew up so quickly. I remember seeing her in Morning Musume. Maybe because I was watching older videos lol I've heard of the group Morning Musume, but I'm not so much into that kind of music.

Anyways, I stayed up for about 3 hours reading all her blogs. She's a very awesome person to me! She had a baby in June. I'm so happy for her. After reading the blog and seeing the pictures I thought "wow, she lives life so fully." I'm happy for her! ^^

Okay, back to the topic. So, I got up and made breakfast. At first I was gonna eat a stupid boxed lunch thingy. But I decided to prepare something instead. It was something simple, oatmeal, toast and some green tea. Even though it's something simple, I feel happy when I cook. Recently it's been this way.

As I stated in my previous blog, cooking makes me happy recently. Knowing that I created something makes me happy! Anyways, I am full. It's such a simple meal, but I don't have to eat very much. Sometimes on occasions I only eat once a day (that's usually on days when I sing for a long time). But can't eat huge amounts of food in one sitting. I feel horribly ill if I eat too much food at once.

 I also decided to read this book someone lent me. It's called The Perks of being a wallflower. It instantly reminded me of a manga called "wallflower". ^^

I finally looked up the meaning of this word in Japanese. It's pretty interesting.

So I guess today isn't all bad. As long as I don't start sighing at my future that hasn't come yet. Something I tell myself is that I have to understand that each moment I live, even now, is the future of yesterday. So what's to fear if your future is at this moment? The future you live then will be the present and also the future of the past.

And this is why it's difficult for me to express myself in Japanese hahahaha

Well, I'm happy to be learning a  new language. I can kind of understand a new culture and the people a bit better.

I think I learn this language to understand more about the rest of the world. Yeah, I wouldn't mind learning another language.

Mon