Feeling negative emotions is okay!

I'm always thinking that in order to better myself I should try not to get frustrated, annoyed or angry. Then I realize how much of an idiotic statement that is because I'm human lol If I didn't have those feelings, I'd be a robot. Always neutral or happy.

It'd be nice to not have to feel frustration, but I'd never understand the feeling of success if I never understood what it's like to be defeated.

I don't like those emotions, but to deny that I have them, would be to limit my experience in life. If I didn't have those, then how would I know what I like and dislike? I'd never be able to improve if I thought everything was okay.

What I mean by this is that if I were to see someone littering, which I actually dislike, and I felt happy about it, I wouldn't feel a need to not litter or feel compelled to at least do my part to stop the littering. Yet, because I do dislike it, I don't do it. Also, if my friends do, and I'm around, I'll give them "the look" or I'll complain or something until they pick it up. In the end, I'd pick it up and lecture them. "What do you think this is? You toss garbage on the ground because you assume someone is going to pick it up! Stop taking advantage of that!"

My mom says "I'm creating jobs" or "the bird will take it" as an excuse.

This isn't the point lol The point is that I woke up this morning annoyed, but I feel better now because I had to tell myself that it's okay to feel that way and not to deny that I'm annoy. I felt that I had good enough reason to feel the way I did, and so now, I feel better.

I once read that past life issues aren't necessarily the problem, but the feelings we had about the problems that is the issue. Whether or not this is true, I can't say, but I always look at my life today and I think back on the traumatic events from the past, and I realize that this may hold some truth due to the fact that I remember those things a lot better than others. The feelings are imprinted to the situation, not the other way around.

So I'm teaching myself to FEEL, but not get swept away into doing some irrational, or making a choice that I feel I can't control due to those feelings. I think it's this that helps us avoid dangerous or risky situations.

In general, I think it takes viewing the thoughts. I accepted my thought, but I changed it to view the possible reason behind the other person's actions. That also eased my annoyance. Trying to at least understand the other person helps. I think that often we aren't willing to do that because we're too angry, and seriously why even try to make excuses for someone's bad behavior that caused our annoyance in the first place?

I often hate to admit things like this because I feel it's an excuse on behalf of the annoyer (which I'm not saying it's bad to feel annoyed or angry), but that they don't often know that they're annoying you. How the heck is such a thing possible? Well, they don't know how your feeling until you lash out on them.

Overall, I think going through possible options behind a person's action (it's more like questioning their actions and answering them), gives more understanding to yourself. I mean, you'll never truly know until you ask the person, right? The point of proving a possible reason is to calm yourself, turning yourself from the thought that "this is annoying" and repeating it, because it will only continue to annoy you. You are pretty much stating to yourself "I want to continue to be annoyed"

I'm only stating that because I did that before getting out of bed lol Yes I was annoyed before my feet even touched the floor. I won't go into details, but before getting up I stared at the ceiling thinking negative things, such as "this was only left on me because that person was too lazy to do it" or "It could've been done last night, but instead they didn't do it, forcing me to do it and make the excuse that they'll be busy with something"

After some time, I started to consider the other factors involved. Then my views changed a bit. I was still slightly annoyed, but I was able to complete the task.

The thought that I had that I should onto this person as they have done unto me, doesn't help either. That's called being vengeful. What good does that do? Why take it into my own hands? It's something I don't have to do, despite that I feel it would help them learn a lesson. Yet it's still vengeful intentions nonetheless. It takes a lot of strength to not allow yourself to be swayed by what you're feeling. I've read that feelings are nothing more than an  instrument, similar to that of the five senses. We're suppose to learn from them, not become a pawn of them.

So I'm doing my best to understand this concept and at least attempt to use it in my life to see if it gives me a sense of improvement. I feel that in order to tell people something works or not, I have to have tried it. Then again, everyone isn't the same, and what may work for one person may not work for another. However, going against this, I'll say that these things have more to do with the mind, than it does with eating something or doing some kind of strenuous activities. It's not like I'm saying "Do art, because you can" although I believe a person could learn.

It's more about helping people to calm themselves and reassure themselves that they are in control of what they choose to do in any given situation. Not about changing who they are....in the sense that you are a personality, an individual with your own dislikes and likes, yet living among others who are similar in that aspect, and understanding that in order to live in relation to each other, there has to be some kind of understanding on our part, for, not just ourselves, but others as well. I believe this is called Emotional I.Q. The ability to understand others.

It's not being a doormat, because I believe I'm far from that, it's just I enjoy knowing that the choice of words and actions lie in my hands. This gives me a personal responsibility. Think of it as building up on your own character. I don't think I'd enjoy being the same forever. I hope to elaborate on these ideas in the future :)

Mon