When you realize that you can't continue to carry your own weighted wagon and someone else's...
Struggle is a tough thing. I don't think a lot of people want to see other people struggle, I know I certainly don't. But, there's a way to look at it as something that isn't so bad. I think it has more to do with what I was taught growing up, not from my mom, but from the times I did go to church as a kid.
It's the compassionate and generous thing to give without requiring something in return. This is sad to be an ultimate kindness. Yet, some people take and take. Imagine it as if your restore your heart and then people come and began to take and take pieces of it, then you have to go heal again, and the same thing happens once more. After some time, wouldn't it make sense that you'll choose who you'll share it with? It's not out of being mean or rude, but the understanding that there are those who could truly need kindness and those who simply want it because they can have it.
I imagine us all starting off with an empty wagon. As we proceed through our journey in life we began to pile on things we've picked up. Along the way we see other people carrying their own wagons as well. We can choose to help them if we want, we can even give encouraging words. Now, there is also the option of pulling their wagon and your own. It's twice the work, but it seems like they can use a hand right? But, what exactly does that person gain from this but a free and carefree ride at your expense.
It could just be my nature but I often feel very harsh when I say things like this, but I try my best not to feel guilty because I understand that it's a part of me that knows that there are people out there like that.
It's easy for them because they just toss all their problems on you.
This hasn't happened to me recently, but it came to mind when I started reading this article here:
http://www.spiritscienceandmetaphysics.com/3-symptoms-of-a-lost-soul/
I didn't get very far when this thought came to mind and I started to wonder why I though struggle is a "bad" thing. Well, of course struggling as helped me in many ways! But I definitely don't enjoy it because it can be tough, but...well think of it like being forced to eat your broccoli as a kid. You can either just get it over with or scoop it under your plate and hope your parents don't find out lol
But we know the saying that vegetables are good for us, well, I think similar of struggles. My theory is that it's a souls way of exercise. I know there are people out there who claim we aren't souls, but, okay, think of it as mental exercises then lol You go through life and you come across obstacles. Based on the past events, you very likely hold the answers to solving this new riddle.
What does this have to do with your wagon? Well, I think we pack on our wagons what we wish to. For example, when you go to a market and you see lots of cool things and lots of interesting people, will you go nuts and start tossing things and people on your wagon, or will you choose what's essential for you? Also, when you realize you don't need certain things in your wagon, will you toss it or will you continue to carry it?
I'm sure you get what I'm saying when I say "wagon" right? If not I'm talking about the weights, burdens, we carry on our shoulders.
Things seems to look a lot more complicated when viewed from the perspective of living, but I always find that thinking of it in terms of something else can make it a bit easier.
I love this Youtuber! Her name is Jenna Marbles, and I think she does a very good and interesting job of explaining why having low expectations is a good things. Despite her vulgar language at time, she makes a lot of interesting points lol
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RljdJzA1nhk
Mon
P.S
I'm not saying you can't help people, I'm saying that you have a choice who you help and should prepare to take responsibility/accept the outcome accordingly. I know someone who seems a bit bitter about all that they gave to someone only to have the person up and leave. I can imagine that such a thing is painful, but I often think that when a person chooses to let someone in their life, it's a choice on their behalf, not something they are forced to do. I've had my share of let downs, but I walk into things with the mentality that if things start to hit the fan I know it's a path I chose and must see it through. It's not always easy, but the things that aren't easy teach us or strengthen us.
I simply say this to give sword and shields to the great fighting warriors of life. I know quite a few and I truly appreciate their great strength and determination. Great warriors like to be acknowledge, I believe, so this is for all the people out there trying their best and those who are doing all they can but don't feel it's enough, let it be known that your efforts are never in vain.
Keep up the good work! If I notice your strength, I'm sure plenty of others do. They just don't say anything :)
Awesome blog Mon and I want to share it. It's so true, we can give from our heart to help others but many times they need to give to themselves too (help themselves). Some may want you to take all their burden away and continually carry it for them. Then this is not giving, it's taking. They are not wanting to help themselves, they only wish to take. Many times, you need to let go in order for them to learn to walk. If you don't they will not grow within. Just like a parent needing to let go of a child's hand to let them walk (and fall) on their own.
ReplyDeleteCompletely agree. The people taking, it seems, may be afraid to stand on their own feet. I say this because I too feel the same way at time. There may be that fear that if they do it alone, they may not have what it takes to continue on. Which isn't true. I believe we all have some kind of strength and we all have some kind of weakness. But a weakness can be strengthened, it isn't something that's permanent.
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