It's tough watching people fail!

It's tough watching people fail. Especially friends and people close to me, even associates. I thought I was just being over-dramatic when it came to me seeing my family members make the same choice, but I've realized that I'm keeping myself in one spot with thinking that way.

Actually, I wouldn't call it failing, because I don't think a person can fail in life. I do think a person can waste a life. It's kind of like going to school, but goofing off and learning absolutely nothing, or not caring. I definitely don't think passing is the end. Nope. I can't justify this feeling, but it's something I've always felt is the truth. Even as a kid, when my older sister's hamsters passed away, I believed they went to animal heaven and when it rained, I always imagined that they were playing in a bathtub full of water and splashing around, which caused it to rain. I don't know why I believed this, but I did lol

Here's the thing, I have a friend that is attending a class with me. She's taken the class more times than me, and yet she keeping failing it. I'm always wondering how it's possible since she already should know what to expect. I figured it's because she hasn't taken a break from school. I guess it can be tiring.

I'm always lecturing her, or asking her about her assignments because I care. I don't want to see her constantly taking the class, but I'm sure she'll pass eventually. I apply this to life as well. For some reason, it's easier to see where someone is making choices that lead to unsatisfying results, because the person gets all depressed or something. It's tough to watch!

But I guess feeling this way is normal. Maybe...

Actually just yesterday I was talking to my sister about my teammates for an animation assignment. She couldn't understand why I was being nice to them when they seemed to be inconsiderate, rude and disrespectful. She was madder than I was lol I was more frustrated than anything, and I asked her why it bothered her some much.

I ponder the possible reasons why someone might be behaving the way that they do. I try not to see a person as being the same as they were a few days ago. But perhaps I should because thinking over wise might seem naive because I'd be giving the person the benefit of the doubt and possibly allowing myself to be subjected to being taken advantage of.Which is possible, but I'm sure it's something I'd do by choice. In the end, I'd have no one to blame but myself. I have to say that, due to a lot of explaining to me by a great friend of mines, I'm more aware of my choices. So much so that it's tough to make choices without wondering if it's my choice to be made. It's really weird.

I don't want to lead people's lives for them, as they have their own life, and I my own. But it's something I've been wondering recently. When to step in and when to allow life to be the teacher.Then again, had I not met a lot of the wonderful people I've met in my life who have showered me with advice and suggestions, I would probably be a different person. But I seriously have a tough time choosing lol It's like a choose your own story game, but the difference is I can't turn the page back.

So I guess I've started small. Figuring out what's the best case of action when presented with a situation. I could choose to react the way people say they would, or react in a way that I feel would help fix the situation. It's a bit tough when it comes to dealing with other people though.

Anyways, I guess I don't want to leave my friend behind despite the fact that I know she'll eventually pass the class and graduate when it's her time. I guess holding on to something like that is kind of similar to me making the choice to fail the class. It doesn't make much sense when I look at this way lol

I think the same of life. We are all given a few situations/tasks/lessons to see how well we do. My theory is that there are no wrong answers, but there's certainly choices that have consequences that we don't necessarily want reflected back to us in life. The best way I can think of viewing your life lessons as you doing well or not is based on your inner harmony, or are things quite chaotic. If it's chaotic, then chances are you might need to do a bit of reflecting. Is there something you're neglecting about yourself?

It's a bit strange, but I've had the toughest time with focusing on what I'd like to do in life. I've noticed that I'm unsure of what I'd like to focus on besides my hobbies, such as what kind of job I'd like, what kind of home I'd like, things like that. But recently I've started to focus on my schoolwork and on improving things I'd like to improve on. I'm a bit happier if I can just get over the feeling of guilt lol If I'm working on something I feel that I'm neglecting my friends and family, but if I'm socializing I feel like I'm neglecting my work! Oddly enough it seems as if there's no inbetween with me xD

But I will say that I'm enjoying learning a bit of what I have. It's become a bit easier to say no to things that I don't want to do. I've began to accept that I don't have to explain why I don't want to do something to someone. It's the same with me. I'm trying to accept that no one has to explain themselves, their personal preferences, their likes, their dislikes, their choices, etc, to me, because it's their life.

I'm not saying don't take an interest in other people's lives, but be realistic about it and be understanding. Not everyone will like what you like. Not everyone will agree. If we can began to understand this simple concept, I believe we can work together as long as we keep trying. But some people are into their own traditions. I can see how it can be tough, but regardless of how we feel about what someone thinks/feels, there will continue to be people born in this world who will feel and think that way. Perhaps this is a lesson to those people who feel stuck in their ways. It's coming to accept that you don't have to like what someone likes, but to also realize that their life is not your life. Now unless someone is intruding on your life and they're life threatening or harming another's life, there really no reason for a person to take that person's life some personally. You'd honestly just be wasting your breath. Sometimes we simply have to compromise. I've seen back and forth arguments online where people disagreed with something and just started name calling lol I was like "Just stop and walk away." But I guess doing that would be like admitting defeat. And no one wants to feel defeated.

The strongest thing a person can do is to realize that they're strongest when they can walk away from something that isn't worth their time. Why? Because it's honestly difficult to do and it seems most people wouldn't make this choice. And I think, for this very reason, that it's a tough choice. Any choice that goes against the norm of what people would expect of another is tough and it takes a strong mind to understand this.

Well, that's all for now.

Mon