So the job fair was called off early. We ended up at the wrong place after walking through the heat for what felt like 10 minutes lol I don't really like the heat.
We thought it was at the college where I got the pamphlet but it was at a nearby high school. The event wasn't suppose to be over until 4 p.m. We made it to the high school at about 3 p.m. but as I said, it was cancelled. Well I'm not upset or anything. I'l find me a job eventually. In the meantime I've been thinking about what kind of job I'd like. First it would be one where my boss wouldn't try to impose on my school schedule. I'm sure there are people like this in the world lol Then it would pay a decent amount of money. At my last part-time job I was making only 7.25 an hour. It was pretty decent. :3 Mainly because I don't spend money like crazy. However, at the time my mom wasn't working so I was helping with the bills and groceries. Of course I look back and think how great it would've been to have still had that money, but I was happy helping out. I actually felt like I was lending a hand :3 So Although I may not have much money now, it's okay.
Well lately I've been thinking the reason I don't have a job now is because it's not time yet. Which is understandable. But that doesn't mean I won't sit around. Recently I've been thinking that I can't depend on my mom and older sister for everything. I have to learn to use what I have within myself to solve my own problems. I believe, this is how we become stronger. It's a bit nerve wrecking because since we've been kids we have been told how to do things, and to break from the comfort can be a little uncomfortable. But I feel that I have so much I can do and I'm selling myself short.
Of course one thing is to help with the community. It's not something I feel I need to do, or have to do, but I want to do this. To me it's kind of like improving. And :3 I like improvement. But I have to know that what I'm giving is being put to the use it's said it will be put. So I think to myself sometimes "what if I start my own organization?" in that case I would know that the money is going to the right cause. Lately I've been doing online survey's, and there's this donation thing to help with the environment. It seems like a good thing, but I'm not sure if it works. I would need to be in person to experience it first-hand. I feel that a lot of what people offer could be taken for granted. Those are the kinds of things I'm looking out for.
If someone is going to lend a hand and swear by it, don't become greedy. :( Some people actually care y'know.
Anyways, I'm gonna take a nap.
Mon
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Job Fair
Today I'm going to a job fair. It ends at 4 p.m. today. I didn't wake up until late today.
I wonder what it's like. I've never been to one before.
Mon
I wonder what it's like. I've never been to one before.
Mon
Friday, August 23, 2013
Creating~ Placing ideas into reality
Good morning!
It's getting pretty late here but I'm up reading about improving my writing skill. I'm not sure if I'm a bad writer. I believe it's the fact that I'm not sure how to get my ideas out. There's so many I find it a challenge to stick with one and keep working at it.
However, I would like to share stories. I'm not sure if it'll be with the world, but I would like to write. I think when I imagine that I'll share it with the world I hold back. So maybe if I write everything first without the thought that I'll be sharing it, I feel it will be original.
For example, one story I'm working on is about a guy who places the souls of people into a new world he created by making a pact with a dark being.
I like stories with symbolism. For example, the sun is shining and the character is holding a glass and they come to realization. The room grows darker and darker and it begins to ran. The glass falls to the ground and there is a close up on the glass, and in the reflection of the glass, we see the character running out the door into the rain. Without much saying, my deep feeling would be an impact of where the person's mind and heart shatters and left behind. It's a realization they don't want to face, but it's unavoidable.
I'm not sure if that makes sense but trying to get this image out is a tougher than it seems. Because I'm into illustration and drawing, I would sit and sit just scribbling and getting frustrated because I just can't get what I'm trying to get out. They say "think about angles, lightening etc." <----teachers say this. And I wonder "how can I enjoy this if there's all these rules!" and I'm guessing it becomes second nature overtime. It's something to consider, not to overgeneralize I guess.
I think some of my good work are ones were I just let it flow. And I think this is how it's suppose to be. It's the same with painting. When I took a painting class in high school I remember the teacher kept telling us not to get to rigid and just allow ourselves to freely paint. I started off very stiff and just precise and I guess it showed. She said I was focusing to much on trying to get it perfect.
Story writing is like art. It should flow freely. Then we can go over and improve on it. I think writing is like the subconscious (or art is general). When we trying to over think, we tend to lose the meaning (the original impress) that was there to begin with.
It's kind of like recalling a dream. I once read that we would tend to try to add details we feel would make the dream better rather than relaying what we dreamt. I guess this is a conscious thing; to make things more elaborate, interesting.
Maybe I should just stop over thinking and just write. Rather than wondering if people will like it or not. Those were the days. I found that when I realized people like what I write, I'll start writing what I think would be best to write rather than what I was planning to write.
Well, in the end I guess it's best to just write and see. Hayao Miyazaki does this. He said he doesn't try to impress anyone. I think I should try to follow that!
Well, I'm gonna read some more and head in.
Night
Mon
It's getting pretty late here but I'm up reading about improving my writing skill. I'm not sure if I'm a bad writer. I believe it's the fact that I'm not sure how to get my ideas out. There's so many I find it a challenge to stick with one and keep working at it.
However, I would like to share stories. I'm not sure if it'll be with the world, but I would like to write. I think when I imagine that I'll share it with the world I hold back. So maybe if I write everything first without the thought that I'll be sharing it, I feel it will be original.
For example, one story I'm working on is about a guy who places the souls of people into a new world he created by making a pact with a dark being.
I like stories with symbolism. For example, the sun is shining and the character is holding a glass and they come to realization. The room grows darker and darker and it begins to ran. The glass falls to the ground and there is a close up on the glass, and in the reflection of the glass, we see the character running out the door into the rain. Without much saying, my deep feeling would be an impact of where the person's mind and heart shatters and left behind. It's a realization they don't want to face, but it's unavoidable.
I'm not sure if that makes sense but trying to get this image out is a tougher than it seems. Because I'm into illustration and drawing, I would sit and sit just scribbling and getting frustrated because I just can't get what I'm trying to get out. They say "think about angles, lightening etc." <----teachers say this. And I wonder "how can I enjoy this if there's all these rules!" and I'm guessing it becomes second nature overtime. It's something to consider, not to overgeneralize I guess.
I think some of my good work are ones were I just let it flow. And I think this is how it's suppose to be. It's the same with painting. When I took a painting class in high school I remember the teacher kept telling us not to get to rigid and just allow ourselves to freely paint. I started off very stiff and just precise and I guess it showed. She said I was focusing to much on trying to get it perfect.
Story writing is like art. It should flow freely. Then we can go over and improve on it. I think writing is like the subconscious (or art is general). When we trying to over think, we tend to lose the meaning (the original impress) that was there to begin with.
It's kind of like recalling a dream. I once read that we would tend to try to add details we feel would make the dream better rather than relaying what we dreamt. I guess this is a conscious thing; to make things more elaborate, interesting.
Maybe I should just stop over thinking and just write. Rather than wondering if people will like it or not. Those were the days. I found that when I realized people like what I write, I'll start writing what I think would be best to write rather than what I was planning to write.
Well, in the end I guess it's best to just write and see. Hayao Miyazaki does this. He said he doesn't try to impress anyone. I think I should try to follow that!
Well, I'm gonna read some more and head in.
Night
Mon
Sunday, August 18, 2013
Strange Dream.
I had a dream I was this Asian middle aged lady (Korean) and I died from some kind of stomach complication, I remember vomiting and there was foam around my mouth lol . I had two daughter, an older one and a younger one, but they were both young adults. The eldest had a husband and a young girl and young boy and my youngest had a young girl. I remember following them to this house. My eldest daughter and her husband were planning to dump off this house to a tree to jump down to the the ground because I wasn't alive. Luckily I didn't actually look down. But the order went this way, first her husband jumped, then the mother, then their son and younger daughter. My youngest daughter was going to jump but she got scared. Her youngest daughter was standing on the roof in shocked and I walked to her and grabbed her hand and said 'don' worry. you can live.' and I helped her off the roof and over the gate to her mom. I guess my youngest daughter called someone to pick them up.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Why do you keep shouting to me? We aren't Seagulls!
So I'm kind of annoyed lol my mom's room is right across from mines and I'm in my room singing. And she comes in my room and says "I'm shouting and calling you, but you can't even hear me." And I ask her "what's up?" and she responds "Someone could've broken in the house. And they would kill you first" and I'm like "what's up?" and all she wanted to show me was a photo from facebook lol
She always does this.She always wants to turn a normal situation into something bad. Always saying "someone could've killed me, and you wouldn't hear" and I'd just nod my head. Rather than actually coming to my room, or coming to speak to me, she feels the need to shout and have me come to her. It's like, scream only when there's an emergency. It loses it's significance if it's always done.
I hate when my family members do that. It makes the house noisy. Rather than getting up from their laptop or from watching t.v. they shout from room to room. :/
Mon
She always does this.She always wants to turn a normal situation into something bad. Always saying "someone could've killed me, and you wouldn't hear" and I'd just nod my head. Rather than actually coming to my room, or coming to speak to me, she feels the need to shout and have me come to her. It's like, scream only when there's an emergency. It loses it's significance if it's always done.
I hate when my family members do that. It makes the house noisy. Rather than getting up from their laptop or from watching t.v. they shout from room to room. :/
Mon
Monday, August 5, 2013
08.05.13
For the past few day, or weeks, I have been relaxing. Well, I've also been working on a webcomic and that's been keeping my mind if but busy.
But mainly I've been resting up.By resting up I man, keeping the stress down. I've been going out, but it has been nothing too strenuous. When summer break began I thought "I'll work on this and this and this!" with determination. But I stopped and realized I put a lot of effort forward to meeting all my deadlines last quarter and that it's okay to take a break.
Which means, if I work on anything, let it be one project. I was working on a short movie, an animation project and my webcomic. I did say I'll finish my animation project, but it doesn't have to be now. I'm thinking I'll work on it once I complete my webcomic. Since I started the webcomic first and my readers have patiently waited until I returned (I was away to work on my class assignments and didn't post anything), I said I'll complete the next chapter before my classes begin again.
I also still have an interest in languages. It's fun to be able to understand what someone else is saying in another language.But lately I haven't been studying as much.
I have been exercising often :3 And getting lots of sleep. So much so I feel that I'm wasting time lol I think it's because I have red curtains in my room. It allows just enough soft light to make me feel sleepy. Or maybe it's the atmosphere of my room. It's very cozy. Even my cat sleeps the day away in my room. But when I open the curtains, I don't get sleepy.
I wonder if it's a Cancer thing. Gackt, he's a Cancer, and he had the same issue. If he made his home too cozy he wouldn't want to leave home. So he made it uncozy. Yeah...I don't want to be a hermit, but I don't know how to make something uncozy. My room is quite clean besides the books I use daily, but I think it's the curtain lol maybe I need new curtains.
Well, I think I'm rested well enough. But my new concern is finding a job. O__o I'm not sure where I want to work for a part-time job. My sister says she isn't being picky. But I am :/ I know how I am. As long as it's decent enough for me, I don't mind. But if the environment is bad I won't be really happy.My mood is often effected by the atmosphere. It sucks, but I try to hide it often.
I'm aiming for working at Pier 1 imports! The place is fancy and it smells nice. I'm not too concerned with the pay :3 but the place is quite nice. I will start paying off my loan when I get a job.
I've also been trying not to say "I need a job" and say "I'll have a job" or something like that. I know that having a job is necessary to start paying my school back *__* So I'm gonna be persistent. I already filled out 2 applications to Pier 1. It's been a while, but whatever. I think Petco would be a nice place too. I have animals, so cleaning up after them is nothing new to me.
Oh! Also, there is someone who would like to to teach them how to crochet O__o I haven't crocheted in a while. So I have to pick up the hook and practice.I haven't given her a set day, I'm just not feeling anything. Most of the time I could say "Oh! Okay, today is a good day." but I haven't been feeling that. I'm not quite sure what she wants to learn to crochet though. A simple blanket for starters would be nice. So hopefully she wants to start with that.
I also think I should do more handicraft stuff. And, I also have an extra blank canvas which needs to be painted on. I wanted to do that. I think I'll take a break from my webcomic once I complete this chapter. I would like to finish that this month. Anytime this month, just before Sept. My classes begin on Sept. 30. So I will use the rest of August and September to do some crafting. I still have two rugs I need to complete and I was working on basket weaving. These are skills I don't want to just toss out the window lol
There's just so much! It's hard for me to say I'm bored. I guess learning new skills help me to see that there's all kinds of things that can be done in life.
Mon
But mainly I've been resting up.By resting up I man, keeping the stress down. I've been going out, but it has been nothing too strenuous. When summer break began I thought "I'll work on this and this and this!" with determination. But I stopped and realized I put a lot of effort forward to meeting all my deadlines last quarter and that it's okay to take a break.
Which means, if I work on anything, let it be one project. I was working on a short movie, an animation project and my webcomic. I did say I'll finish my animation project, but it doesn't have to be now. I'm thinking I'll work on it once I complete my webcomic. Since I started the webcomic first and my readers have patiently waited until I returned (I was away to work on my class assignments and didn't post anything), I said I'll complete the next chapter before my classes begin again.
I also still have an interest in languages. It's fun to be able to understand what someone else is saying in another language.But lately I haven't been studying as much.
I have been exercising often :3 And getting lots of sleep. So much so I feel that I'm wasting time lol I think it's because I have red curtains in my room. It allows just enough soft light to make me feel sleepy. Or maybe it's the atmosphere of my room. It's very cozy. Even my cat sleeps the day away in my room. But when I open the curtains, I don't get sleepy.
I wonder if it's a Cancer thing. Gackt, he's a Cancer, and he had the same issue. If he made his home too cozy he wouldn't want to leave home. So he made it uncozy. Yeah...I don't want to be a hermit, but I don't know how to make something uncozy. My room is quite clean besides the books I use daily, but I think it's the curtain lol maybe I need new curtains.
Well, I think I'm rested well enough. But my new concern is finding a job. O__o I'm not sure where I want to work for a part-time job. My sister says she isn't being picky. But I am :/ I know how I am. As long as it's decent enough for me, I don't mind. But if the environment is bad I won't be really happy.My mood is often effected by the atmosphere. It sucks, but I try to hide it often.
I'm aiming for working at Pier 1 imports! The place is fancy and it smells nice. I'm not too concerned with the pay :3 but the place is quite nice. I will start paying off my loan when I get a job.
I've also been trying not to say "I need a job" and say "I'll have a job" or something like that. I know that having a job is necessary to start paying my school back *__* So I'm gonna be persistent. I already filled out 2 applications to Pier 1. It's been a while, but whatever. I think Petco would be a nice place too. I have animals, so cleaning up after them is nothing new to me.
Oh! Also, there is someone who would like to to teach them how to crochet O__o I haven't crocheted in a while. So I have to pick up the hook and practice.I haven't given her a set day, I'm just not feeling anything. Most of the time I could say "Oh! Okay, today is a good day." but I haven't been feeling that. I'm not quite sure what she wants to learn to crochet though. A simple blanket for starters would be nice. So hopefully she wants to start with that.
I also think I should do more handicraft stuff. And, I also have an extra blank canvas which needs to be painted on. I wanted to do that. I think I'll take a break from my webcomic once I complete this chapter. I would like to finish that this month. Anytime this month, just before Sept. My classes begin on Sept. 30. So I will use the rest of August and September to do some crafting. I still have two rugs I need to complete and I was working on basket weaving. These are skills I don't want to just toss out the window lol
There's just so much! It's hard for me to say I'm bored. I guess learning new skills help me to see that there's all kinds of things that can be done in life.
Mon
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