The soul is an interesting thing!
Recently I've been away just being and doing what I feel like doing at the moment. I often wonder if it's enough (tbh I could be doing more in the arts lol but more on that later). But now I wonder, in regards to whom am I actually pondering about this? If I was to say I wasn't content and enjoying myself as I am now, I'd be lying.
For example, on a whim I'll just randomly go for a walk outside and look take in the sights, with no other intention then this then I'll go "this is great!", because I'll feel a sense of excitement and joy in something so simple.
In regards to my art, I'll doodle, but I've done nothing substantial. I've been doing a lot (and I mean A LOT) of reading on various topics. Recently I've been reading about game design and programming. I'm currently reading about chakras, Nostradamus (again lol), astrology and learning to draw in perspective. So when I have a bunch of topics I'm covering I try not to overwhelm myself by thinking I need to DO so much! Mostly I'll just burn myself out.
When it comes to my ideas I simply jolt them down, that way I'll be able to come back to them later. This work for me! It's something I've also been doing before bed, if I have a bunch of ideas starting to pour in while I'm trying to sleep.
I found that when I try to control this flow I actually interrupt it. When I was in school I actually said how I actually felt like the school was leeching me of my creativity energy. Prior to attending I would draw so much and fill so many sketch books with drawings. But once I attended my first year I felt so drain and felt like I couldn't produce anything proper. I also wasn't drawing as much as I felt like it wasn't as enjoyable.
This is what has halted me from wanting to work for a company as I question if I'll be truly happy with creating art for other people. I truly enjoy my freedom. That's not to say I wouldn't ever want to help someone bring about an intangible idea, quite the opposite, I would like this very much. However, it would be of my own choosing and not in a way that is draining of me.
I've come to truly understand that how I feel truly does effect my work haha I don't like it, but I can't turn it off. I can adjust, but going to college and experiencing it first hand as taught me that it will still happen even if I try my best to adjust. So I just accept it and move along freely.
And with this I've come to understand that soul and the way it likes to live is completely different from how humans may think we should. I'm not basing this only from this one experience but from other things I've noticed from other people as well.
It's the thing that keeps us up at night. Our human brain understand very well that going to work and making money is very important, but the spirit realm doesn't have this concept of time and so the energy may disrupt us.
This is my theory anyways lol I could very well be wrong, but I would like to think this is the reason for our instabilities.
I personally feeling wide awake at 2 or 3 in the morning, but I found that I can work more efficiently. I guess because it's quieter during the night than during the day. And because of this I've been considering more and more to try my hand at working from home. At least for now anyways. I'll start working on my webcomic again, but mostly I'd like to share stories that come to mind. If they help move people in some way, then I'd be happy. :) Somehow, I'd just like my work and my life to be in-sync with one another so I can feel at peace and feel that everything is harmonious.
Have you also been feeling that the world and the people have been quite strange? I think something is happening and it may be affecting everyone. Could just be me though, but I feel like people are changing in some way. I'm just hoping it will be for the best of the world, for themselves and everyone around them.
Mon
