Hi!
It's getting late but I was doing some reading and it gave me an idea for a piece of a story that I've had in the back of my mind. When it comes to me creating stories, I kind of let them create themselves or sometimes I'll think "Would such an such do this?" or "How would this sound?" or I'd probably think of a mannerism, think of what their life may be like and keep it in mind.
As of now I decided to not start any new stories until after I at least complete the fourth chapter of my webcomic. Due to me focusing on school, I go on a 3 month hiatus between updates to work on school projects.
Anyway, I still keep stories I'd like to create in mind and I'd jolt down ideas or just random ideas for the characters. So I'd like to share one from a story I'd like to write someday. The time I came up with is The Dream Membrane. I have no idea what it means, and I'm not sure if I'll keep it, but the idea I have for now is about a young teenage boy who has nightmares/strange dreams after the disappearance of his younger sister a few years ago. He lives only with his mother who spends most of her time sulking around or praying for the safety of her daughter. That's all I have for now, including a few ideas.
Well, here's the excerpt.
*****************************************************
"With each link clicked, each website visited,
Julian's eyes grow heavier and
heavier as he began to lose the
battle between his mind, which wants
to stay awake, and his body which has
grown weary from the long day.
He continues to try to fight back the
temptation of sleep and proceeds to scrolls
through more forums, in hopes of
finding some kind of information, anything that would bring hope because the
hope he had originally felt years ago
slowly diminished, and the only thing
keeping him going now is simply his
will. Will for what exactly, is what he ponders often.
Yet the search for answer only feels
to be like pursuing the inevitable as
he passes link after link of people
posting their own experiences and
venting their own personal
frustrations. Maybe they did
experience something that he could relate to, yet with that understanding
it didn't make some of the post less weird and despite trying to rid that feeling
it still seemed quite strange.
Such as one post posted by a young male who wrote:
"I can see spirits! Sometimes I even
see myself standing beside my bed
without a mouth!"
That's the last straw...
With a draining sigh he shuts his
laptop and tilts his head back in the
chair, clasping his hands over his
face and gentle rubbing his face and temples,
wiping away the frustration of
another night wasted.
He raises his head and looks over at
the clock. It's just a little over
eleven p.m. Although the feeling of
sleep is quite strong, he's certain that even if he tried to sleep
tonight will be just like the
others and with that decides to take a trip to
the nearby convenience store instead.
After all, he could use the air."
******************************************************************
That's all that came to mind. This makes me think back to a website in which I was posting a story from my mind. I should find another one and do that again. Actually, now that I think back, I had two websites in which I posted my stories. One was Tokyopop, but it changed over the years and I don't think it allows people to post their own writings. I had quite a few readers during that time.
Then I started posting on another website, but I forgot the name. I enjoy coming up with stories, but just like with drawing, I don't think I'd enjoy doing it every day. Recently I've grown a bit distant of the idea of being demanded to do work.
I understand that some people say that that is what the working world is all about, but that's just the problem. When all is about work and making money, how can you remember what freedom (true freedom) and enjoyment is??? I like to think of ants. They spend so much time working, it's become so natural to them, that if they were to be bounded, wouldn't it drive them nuts? They're not sure what to do with themselves!
Of course I could just be saying that to justify why I don't. Actually I'm very sure that's why! lol
Anyways, I've been taking it one day at a time as my time to graduate from college grows closer and closer. Deep inside I tell myself that everything will work out one way or another and I start to wonder how. I think about how my teachers tell us to sell ourselves and I think that that's just a horrible thing to tell people. In a nutshell, you're acting as something you're truly not in order to impress someone. I could be just living in a fantasy, but if I were to like someone to hire me, I would much rather be as honest with them as possible. Mainly because if I ever admit to not being able to do something, I can assure them that I can learn it. All it takes is finding the resources necessary.
Regardless, I'm not sure how I feel about working in animation. Meeting deadline after deadline. Don't get me wrong, it gives me something to work towards, but I don't know if I can do this for so many years. I dunno. I'll simply keep my options opened. I've left it in the hands of the universe and what they think will work best for me. I guess you can say I'm gonna go with the flow on this one. I do get a bit nervous but without a clear idea of exactly where I can place my talents and abilities, I decided to trust in a higher power :) But of course I'll still do what I can while I wait.
Well, that's all for now. Feel free to leave a comment letting me know what you think about the excerpt.
Mon
Sunday, May 17, 2015
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
Long time no typey!
Hiiiii!
So it's been so long right? It's not that I haven't typed a blog, it's just that I would start one and save it as a draft and never finish it. It's not that I'm busy or anything! Of course I'm not TOO busy, but I am trying to keep my stress down and prioritize my time (with video games and laughs included!)
I'll try to keep this blog brief because I have to get to bed.
So first, I've started reading a book about Buddhism. Interesting stuff. Honestly I always had this strange idea that Gautama was some guy who refined from sexual encounters and sat under a tree all day meditating (yeah, my mind...). I always assume that anyone on a spiritual journey would deprive themselves of any of lives luxury. Yet I always forget that they lived some kind of life before they decided to make that life altering journey. So it turns out that he was born into quite a wealthy family and had many luxuries. He even had a wife and child! *MINDBLOWN* :P
Secondly, for my team production class my group and I are working on a sci-fi game. I'm not a sci-fi fan, but I do like trying to invent things. I'm an asset modeler for my team. :) I've learned a lot from the groups leader. I'm sure they think I'm quite bad at modeling because I ask so many question, but in reality I'm stealing their techniques! Muahahaha. But no seriously, if I see someone doing good work I'd like to incorporate that into my own work if I don't have that skill. I think this applies mainly to modeling though. :)
Third, um....
Hm....I guess that's all lol Well from what I can remember anyways.
Oh! About Buddhism, I'd like to learn about different religions! There's quite a few out there. I don't necessarily do this to choose a religion, but it helps me understand the people who are from the religious background.
Oh! I didn't mention the girl who would pray behind me did I. Okay, well, about a month back I would often sit in this tiny space in the back of the library. At around 1 p.m. a girl would come back there and start praying. O__O I felt like I was intruding the first time. But I was also happy that she was okay with doing that in my presence. At one point I wanted to ask her if I should leave until she'd done, but I felt that that could be considered offensive because I'm interrupting her and I'm also making her praying a big deal.
I'm not sure which religion it is (I believe it's Muslim.....you see why I want to read about other religions lol) but I think it's the one where they pray about every few hours for about 30 minutes to and hour. She was wearing a hijab. Actually there is a man who works at the gas station near my home who will pray in the morning. He'd have the gas station closed while he pray.
I dunno, despite the fact that I'm not Muslim, I don't feel right standing between someone and their religion. I look at it like this, if it helps them to want to better themselves or they find a sense of peace, I can respect that.
Anyways, I got use to her doing this. Although at one point I did leave to give her some space. Maybe I was just being weird lol but I feel those kinds of moments are quite personal. It's between them and what they believe in.
I'm also working on some new 2D animations! Woooo! It's for class :) But I'm happy because I've been thinking about how I'd like to work on some more but haven't found the moment to do so. So taking this class is perfect. :) Looking at my situation I feel that things do work in interesting way.
It's all about being aware of it. And noticing those things makes me happy.
Let's say I'll be thinking "I'd really like some white chocolate" and I'll put it in the back of my mind, a few days later someone will present to me some white chocolate and I'll say "Oh my god! I was thinking about how I'd like some white chocolate a few days ago" and in the back of my mind I'd be saying thank you.
Despite the fact that I don't claim a religion I do definitely believe in guidance from beyond our world. Not sure exactly how they work....without my imagination running wild that is, but I do truly believe this exist.
Hm....what bothers me is when people say "well prove it!" as if I can prove just about everything that comes from my mouth. I can't prove that the world I speak exist because you can't see my words, but you can certainly hear them (if you have that ability). I can't make you see because, despite the fact that you say you have sight, doesn't mean you see as others see. So does it mean that sight truly exist for you? And who's to say that your sight is actually sight? Now prove that to me lol
I do like questioning things though. I do this to gain a true understanding of things...not just from the person but for myself. For the most part I'm questioning myself aloud in the presence of someone else lol
I like getting to the bottom of something. See if it makes sense. By making sense I mean does it work. Will it seem to have a good or bad consequence? Have I experienced something similar? Is there a way to gain some kind of insight based on this situation and come to a sound and balance answer?
Recently I don't spend too much time going over and over in my head these kinds of things. I mean with simple things, but I do them when it comes to thinking about improving myself and improving how best to communicate with people. I found that this is actually called something, it's something called Emotional Intelligence. I always thought I was a bit strange for spending so much time trying to learn to communicate with people, but subconsciously I guess I find it to be helpful, mainly because it keeps me opened to connecting with different people.
Anyways, the whole "everything will fall into place" thing has been happening. I always feel that this is proof enough. The thing is that it took almost a year for things to "get back" to me lol or someone. It's like, why are you so late returning my phone call?
Of course it's said that Earth is at a dense vibration and things take a while to happen here. The thing is being patient. I've honestly seen people say they will wait and then complain about a week later how things aren't looking up.
It can be tough to stay in high spirits all the time, but it's best to at least try to understand that things will get better. I say this matter-of-factly because it has gotten better from the past.
Now for people who are ill, I have no answer for this and it's a matter I don't feel I can speak on. But I definitely thing the best thing we can give is a smile, because happiness is something that I think is subjective. Some may claim that happiness is one thing and others another.
Well, I've typed enough. Just wanted to let my readers know I'm well and alive. It does feel great to type something after so long.
Mon
So it's been so long right? It's not that I haven't typed a blog, it's just that I would start one and save it as a draft and never finish it. It's not that I'm busy or anything! Of course I'm not TOO busy, but I am trying to keep my stress down and prioritize my time (with video games and laughs included!)
I'll try to keep this blog brief because I have to get to bed.
So first, I've started reading a book about Buddhism. Interesting stuff. Honestly I always had this strange idea that Gautama was some guy who refined from sexual encounters and sat under a tree all day meditating (yeah, my mind...). I always assume that anyone on a spiritual journey would deprive themselves of any of lives luxury. Yet I always forget that they lived some kind of life before they decided to make that life altering journey. So it turns out that he was born into quite a wealthy family and had many luxuries. He even had a wife and child! *MINDBLOWN* :P
Secondly, for my team production class my group and I are working on a sci-fi game. I'm not a sci-fi fan, but I do like trying to invent things. I'm an asset modeler for my team. :) I've learned a lot from the groups leader. I'm sure they think I'm quite bad at modeling because I ask so many question, but in reality I'm stealing their techniques! Muahahaha. But no seriously, if I see someone doing good work I'd like to incorporate that into my own work if I don't have that skill. I think this applies mainly to modeling though. :)
Third, um....
Hm....I guess that's all lol Well from what I can remember anyways.
Oh! About Buddhism, I'd like to learn about different religions! There's quite a few out there. I don't necessarily do this to choose a religion, but it helps me understand the people who are from the religious background.
Oh! I didn't mention the girl who would pray behind me did I. Okay, well, about a month back I would often sit in this tiny space in the back of the library. At around 1 p.m. a girl would come back there and start praying. O__O I felt like I was intruding the first time. But I was also happy that she was okay with doing that in my presence. At one point I wanted to ask her if I should leave until she'd done, but I felt that that could be considered offensive because I'm interrupting her and I'm also making her praying a big deal.
I'm not sure which religion it is (I believe it's Muslim.....you see why I want to read about other religions lol) but I think it's the one where they pray about every few hours for about 30 minutes to and hour. She was wearing a hijab. Actually there is a man who works at the gas station near my home who will pray in the morning. He'd have the gas station closed while he pray.
I dunno, despite the fact that I'm not Muslim, I don't feel right standing between someone and their religion. I look at it like this, if it helps them to want to better themselves or they find a sense of peace, I can respect that.
Anyways, I got use to her doing this. Although at one point I did leave to give her some space. Maybe I was just being weird lol but I feel those kinds of moments are quite personal. It's between them and what they believe in.
I'm also working on some new 2D animations! Woooo! It's for class :) But I'm happy because I've been thinking about how I'd like to work on some more but haven't found the moment to do so. So taking this class is perfect. :) Looking at my situation I feel that things do work in interesting way.
It's all about being aware of it. And noticing those things makes me happy.
Let's say I'll be thinking "I'd really like some white chocolate" and I'll put it in the back of my mind, a few days later someone will present to me some white chocolate and I'll say "Oh my god! I was thinking about how I'd like some white chocolate a few days ago" and in the back of my mind I'd be saying thank you.
Despite the fact that I don't claim a religion I do definitely believe in guidance from beyond our world. Not sure exactly how they work....without my imagination running wild that is, but I do truly believe this exist.
Hm....what bothers me is when people say "well prove it!" as if I can prove just about everything that comes from my mouth. I can't prove that the world I speak exist because you can't see my words, but you can certainly hear them (if you have that ability). I can't make you see because, despite the fact that you say you have sight, doesn't mean you see as others see. So does it mean that sight truly exist for you? And who's to say that your sight is actually sight? Now prove that to me lol
I do like questioning things though. I do this to gain a true understanding of things...not just from the person but for myself. For the most part I'm questioning myself aloud in the presence of someone else lol
I like getting to the bottom of something. See if it makes sense. By making sense I mean does it work. Will it seem to have a good or bad consequence? Have I experienced something similar? Is there a way to gain some kind of insight based on this situation and come to a sound and balance answer?
Recently I don't spend too much time going over and over in my head these kinds of things. I mean with simple things, but I do them when it comes to thinking about improving myself and improving how best to communicate with people. I found that this is actually called something, it's something called Emotional Intelligence. I always thought I was a bit strange for spending so much time trying to learn to communicate with people, but subconsciously I guess I find it to be helpful, mainly because it keeps me opened to connecting with different people.
Anyways, the whole "everything will fall into place" thing has been happening. I always feel that this is proof enough. The thing is that it took almost a year for things to "get back" to me lol or someone. It's like, why are you so late returning my phone call?
Of course it's said that Earth is at a dense vibration and things take a while to happen here. The thing is being patient. I've honestly seen people say they will wait and then complain about a week later how things aren't looking up.
It can be tough to stay in high spirits all the time, but it's best to at least try to understand that things will get better. I say this matter-of-factly because it has gotten better from the past.
Now for people who are ill, I have no answer for this and it's a matter I don't feel I can speak on. But I definitely thing the best thing we can give is a smile, because happiness is something that I think is subjective. Some may claim that happiness is one thing and others another.
Well, I've typed enough. Just wanted to let my readers know I'm well and alive. It does feel great to type something after so long.
Mon
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